I wanted to preface that this is something that I wrote to be published. I had written this back in 2022, but life has different plans for me at that time. So it was shelved. I recently came across it, so I decided to publish it here. Shockingly, for me, the article was exactly what I needed to do. I have written previously for a blog, and was contemplating another piece on the other side of parenting. Many things have changed in my life since them, but it came back at the exact time it needed to.
Seeds of integrity.
We can all appreciate seeds of integrity that we plant in our current situations. Picking up a coffee for the car behind us, chipping in some extra money at the cash register for the person that didn’t have enough, or simply smiling at strangers on a crowded sidewalk. What I am referring to are the seeds of integrity that were planted twenty or thirty years ago. The deep-rooted ones that we have long since forgot about. These are the seeds that will show up when you become a parent, and if they haven’t yet, they will.
When I was kid, I can remember distinctly, most all of the family trips that we took. I couldn’t have cared less about some of the places we went. (Sorry Dad, but it’s different now). I mean sure, the Grand Canyon was fun, or climbing on the rocks at Garden of the Gods or seeing exactly how much water the Hoover Dam holds back. Also, the numerous scenic overlooks where we would all stop to get out and stretch our legs, or bird-watch, would all slowly fade from excitement. Trust me, there is nothing enticing about a little family of five packed into a mid-80’s Plymouth Voyager and headed cross-country. However unexciting that might have been at times, those were my memories and still are today. Those might be some of the greatest seeds of integrity that my father planted.
Moving forward to the present, I consider it an honor to show my child the world around her. As we make the plans to see some of the things that I saw as a kid, those seeds that were planted years ago are quietly making their way to the surface. As silly as it may sound, my hope is that when my daughter has children of her own, she can show them what type of birds are prominent at specific parts around Route 66.
Even as I go a little bit deeper through the years, I can clearly remember the high school and college days. The times when I left, and should have stayed, and things that I never said, that I wished I had. It really isn’t cliche when you’re told that life quickly passes you by if you’re not paying attention. There will be prayers that you prayed years ago that will finally begin to unfold before you. You will find yourself directly positioned in front of things like addiction, trauma, bullying, or maybe even worse. Many of these things you might think you can casually white-knuckled through, and some of them you cannot. At times, I often feel that God is saying, “You are being given another chance to deal with this.” In many cases you might be dealing with it, protecting your child from it, or finding peace and closure within it. Whatever the reason, it has been presented to you once again, and what you choose to do with it will most likely run off on your children. Your children will feel everything that you endured, unless you recognize it, and correct it.
The seeds that we planted years ago are not all bad, but there might be a good deal of them that are not good. My advice to myself is to take the silly trips, don’t be afraid to say, “when I was a kid”, share your stories, and also share your struggles. Your child needs to see their parent’s best accomplishments but also hear their failures. It’s not going to be a prefect process; it wasn’t supposed to be. Even now, the seeds of integrity that you plant in this year will take root and sprout, and you may not see them bloom for years down the road, but your child will. It’s a journey that can be filled with little stopping points along the way, and monumental outcomes. It becomes part of your purpose, and something that you will leave behind.
Leave these seeds of integrity now and nurture them along the way. Then, when time is right, they will reveal themselves in a way that you couldn’t possibly imagine. The footprints that we leave on life, will eventually be home to little, tiny footprints coming up behind us. That will be your legacy, your story, and what you child will one day build upon.
